A letter to a struggling couple

Arguing-CoupleI just continue to hear something that I would like to share.  I am not ever trying to invalidate feelings. Feelings are very real to us and indicate many things to us, through the Holy Spirit.  Today I want to impart to you that love is actually what you are fighting for, not each other.  It’s the struggle to believe in love that leaves us all tired and depressed….and most of all ANGRY!  However I need you to understand that it’s God’s love that runs through you that causes you to yearn for connectedness, yearn for healing. Love is NOT what the movies portray. Some, but VERY VERY few. The main and ONLY STRUGGLE IS THE STRUGGLE TO LOVE and RECEIVE LOVE! What does that mean?  It means that when the Lord loves us and loves through us, how much escape through the cracks of ours brokenness.  We were all made to love. From the very beginning we were made for one thing. LOVE. So when we find ourselves trying to love through brokenness and having not a clue to what that is, we start to focus on what it might not be because we get scared. The minute we begin to accuse someone (NO MATTER WHAT IT IS), we are no longer in love.  Why????  Because 1 Corinthians 13 tells us what love is. When you read those words and we treat them like “a nice phrase” instead of a LIVING MANUAL of how to love….we get lost and frustrated in what we expect out of LOVE for ourselves. God gets excited to think that you might depend on Him to love your wife/husband because He is the only one who can do it RIGHT….through you!  You said I hate this and I don’t want this anymore and I’m NOT HAPPY!….that’s your flesh fighting you and dying to God’s way of feeling these feelings and opening up and letting LOVE in when you don’t think you can because you’re scared of getting hurt.  Getting hurt is part of the process because we must learn that God is in control of our hurt and using it for His glory. God says, “ I CAN!!!”  Let me open up for you….so you submit to God and surrender the defensiveness, and the self-protection of UNforgiveness in the NAME OF JESUS, for Jesus….not for your spouse, and not for you.   May I please encourage you that He can save your marriage, and not only that…He promises to glorify the marriage when you bring Him to the forefront. Truly I tell you that marriages are going to be PRIME targets for the enemy in the days to come. The only closest PLACE PEOPLE CAN RECEIVE AND GIVE LOVE is their families. If he can break up families, he can break up the body of Christ (so he thinks, but WE WON REMEMBER!!!!) So you need to experience what you are going through and see that you come out on top!!!  We all need hope!!!! BUT….it’s not YOUR DOING, it’s the LORD’s.  Seek Him, PRAY for each other, PRAY WITH EACH OTHER….bring Him to the FOREFRONT….and HE PROMISES YOU a LIFE ABUNDANT!!!!  I think when we loose sight of the fact that we are His sons and daughters, we start to look at ourselves and WANT things that are not of God. I’m not saying you are not Godly, I’m saying that we all need to tune in more to want He wants for us, instead of what we think we want for ourselves. Max Lucado has a new book out called “It’s Not About Me! Rescue from the Life We Thought Would Make us Happy”.  I have not read it, but I thought….WOW!  Now that is so true of what married couples struggle with!
In Christ’s Name,

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